Prepare the Way

When Christmas comes my thoughts give way

To memories of yesterday

Of family and friends held dear

Traditions passed from year to year

But in my heart I realize 

I'm drawn by truth to recognize

The "giver" and the "gift" so great

The reason why we celebrate.

It's more than hearing carols sung

And seeing Christmas stockings hung

And pageants held on special nights 

The stories told, the sparkling lights

God's gift fulfilled a promise made 

Through Christ our debt of sin is paid

Throughout the world God's light did shine 

This gift both human and divine.

So I will sing the carols old

And listen to the stories told

Of angels singing in the night

Of shepherds and a star so bright

I'll share the news and gladly tell

Of God with us -- Emmanuel

And in my heart prepare the way

To worship Christ this 'holy' day.  

Dear Jesus, I pray that my understanding of Christmas reflect my knowledge of You and my message of Christmas reveal my relationship with You.  May my celebration of Christmas grow beyond the romance of the holiday.  I desire to worship You in spirit and in truth.  


by Terha Knittel, first printed in an Advent Devotional in 2000 

Life Happens

Life happens.  At times it comes at us like a runaway freight train. Other times it seems to creep along at a snail's pace. And something inside of me always longs for the days when it occurs at a moderate and perfect pace of my choosing.  

But this life I'm living is not my own. The day I've been given is a gift that has been shared with me, but it doesn't belong to me. The sun and the spinning earth that determine when it is day and night, do not answer to me.  The loving God who created all things, who tells the sun when to shine, and who wraps up each day as a gift filled with grace and mercy, is a Master Designer. My times are in His hands. 


His plans for each of us are good. When we walk with Him, He withholds no good thing. When life happens sometimes it is messy and ugly and painful and filled with demanding and difficult situations.  


But when our lives are in His hands, He gives us everything we need as the Holy Spirit navigates a path for us. All of our days are filled with just enough moments, sustaining strength, just the right amount of grace, the perfect amount of wisdom, and more love than our hearts can contain.


Life happens. Sometimes it's not pretty. But my life in His hands equals beauty.  


from Dec. 8, 2011 Daily Heart Devotion

Time to panic?

Today I looked at the calendar for the first time in quite a while.  Using my stellar math skills I have determined that the day we celebrate Christmas is 10 days away.  This new realization, added to what I already knew -- that I've not made any progress in purchasing gifts -- makes me wonder:  should I be panicking about now?!?

I love Christmas.  I love giving and receiving gifts.  Unfortunately for my family and friends, I don't do well when it comes to joining these two things together. My first problem is that I don't really enjoy shopping.  Enough said.  The second problem is that I prefer to give gifts throughout the year and not do an obligatory blowout on one day.  

There is also the unsettling commercial aspects of Christmas. How do we carve out a place of genuine beauty and simplicity in a landscape of excessive winter holiday commercialization?  Have we made this day of celebration into a season of idol worship?  I know that sounds a bit harsh, and you should know that I do not pretend to have any answers.  

Celebrations are not a bad thing.  The giving and receiving of gifts is a lovely part of family, friendship and a wonderful way to express appreciation. Parents love to give gifts to their children.  But I wonder if we don't often get caught up in the foot race that is the public display of "Christmas spirit" and neglect the personal dedication to daily "walk in the Spirit." 

I am making a choice not to panic.  We will celebrate Christ's birth and the gift of His love for us.  There will be laughter and singing and food and fun -- with memories made together as a family.         

Am I a scrooge?  No.  I do not believe that I am.  Will my children have presents on Christmas morning?  Yes.  I believe they will. But in order for that to happen I need to do some shopping.  Herein is love -- that I will shop for Christmas presents for my children even though I do not enjoy shopping. Oh, and then there's the wrapping.  Did I mention that I don't enjoy wrapping presents!?!    

note to self:  do not panic!

Unexpected Opportunities  
How quickly my day can be filled with unexpected opportunities (a.k.a. challenges and obstacles, difficulties and stress inducers). I really want to be a person who can roll with the punches and accept these opportunities with open arms, ready to experience the blessings that are hidden beneath the facade of being unexpected, unwelcomed, unintended, unbecoming and untimely.


When my plans are interrupted or ten more things are added to an already busy morning, I am easily frustrated. I see my time and ability to perform compared to the enormity of what I feel is expected of me. When I do this, I lose. Accepting my inabilities and weaknesses is really quite freeing. Being reliant on His strength and power at work allows me to accomplish the seeming impossible. Trusting in His unfailing faithfulness lets me rest in His arms when the whirlwind that consumes my life spins and turns.  

So, this morning when my husband called and told me the heating/air guys were on their way -- totally unexpected to me -- definitely not on my schedule -- and just something I really didn't want to have to deal with today -- I panicked. (*blush*) How my flesh cries out when I am pinched.  

But in His marvelous, gracious, loving kindness, God came near. As I looked to Him and let Him know how completely unable I was to handle this particular unexpected opportunity, He loved me. He held me close and allowed me to breathe. I imagine He was singing a song of encouragement and love over me.  At least that's how it felt.  

The hidden blessing of this particular unexpected opportunity ... maybe that the children will be warm as they sleep tonight, or that the wet rug was discovered in the boys bathroom before it ruined the floor. It is also possible that the hidden blessing came as the unexpected opportunity sent me to my knees and I was provided a few extra moments of intimate snuggle time with God this morning.  

Living the Best Days of My Life

Musings by the fire

The cool temperature this morning gave me the excuse I needed to build a fire in the fireplace.  This is the first one since last winter.  I enjoy having a fireplace and I love sitting in front of it when its bed is filled with glowing embers and the flames twirl and leap like choreographed dancers on top of the logs.  The crackling and wooshing sounds compose their own beautiful melody and I find myself slowing down and taking a few moments to reflect.

I am much older than I used to be.  This has become plainly apparent to me lately. There are the obvious physical indications. Gravity is making it's mark on my physical appearance, wear and tear is much more noticeable on my joints, over time the sun has affected the look and texture of my skin, and my eyes -- my eyes are not as young as I remember them being.

In addition to the physical evidences of aging, I have noticed that my life experiences have affected how I perceive life in general. This seems to be somehow closely braided with my spiritual journey. I suppose it is all part of a natural maturing process.

Reflecting with a grateful heart is sometimes overwhelming.  When I stop and realize the magnitude of God's blessings in my life, it almost takes my breath away.  So many wonderful gifts have been presented to me over the years.  They are a pleasure to open and are accompanied by smiles and giggles, fun and laughter, abounding in feelings of joy and excitement. 

But struggles and difficulties are also a part of life. We all experience them.  We may not share the same strain of hardships, but we all know how it feels to walk through times of suffering.

We've probably all known darkness that felt all-consuming.  The kind of pain that tears at the heart and feels like it will never end.  Maybe an illness of your own, or that of a family member or dear friend. You may have experienced a broken relationship, the death of someone very dear, or endured the heartache of divorce.

There have been times in my life when I felt as though the darkness of the difficulty I was experiencing would drown me.  I have even entertained thoughts on occasion that God was not near and was not going to help me.

Pain is real. Heartaches happen. Darkness does seem to veil His face at times. In these hours of distress we can become a slave to our circumstance, crippled by despair and paralyzed by fear, or we can place our hope and faith in God.

Is it possible that God can use these great sorrows in our life for His glory?  A friend of mine posted a quote on Facebook recently:  Some of God's best gifts must be unwrapped in the darkness. Think of your last major trial. What "good thing" did the Lord slip into your hands in those difficult days? (Joni Erikson)  Joni Erikson knows something about struggles and difficulties.  She has endured sorrow and heartache.  As a young women with her whole life ahead of her, she suffered a neck injury that left her a quadriplegic, bound to a wheelchair and totally dependent on others to care for her most basic of needs.

I admit that I have not experienced a struggle of this magnitude, but I believe that I have been presented with gifts that were unwrapped in the darkness of trials that seemed unbearable.  In the middle of unspeakable assaults upon me by the enemy of my soul, God came near.  I love this quote by Chuck Swindoll:  ‎"When you persevere through a trial, God gives you a special measure of insight. You become the recipient of the favor of God as He gives to you, and those who suffer with you, something that would not be learned otherwise." 

Because God is good I can enjoy life.  As I sit here in front of the beautiful fire that burns in my fireplace I can reflect on the amazingly good life God has given me and say confidently that I wouldn't want to have experienced it without my share of sorrow.  All along the journey I have witnessed His faithful provision.

One of my favorite provisions, beyond the obvious love for my husband and children, is something that causes my heart much joy.  God has given me the gift of amazing friends.  My life is filled with awesome friends that far exceed what I could have ever hoped for or imagined.  Beautiful people with lovely hearts.  Individuals who cause me to laugh and who inspire me to grow and shower me with love and acceptance.

My skin may be losing the fight with gravity and sun damage, my joints and eyes may evidence my years on earth, but my journey is sweet.  My heart declares that every day is made by God and whether it is filled with sunshine or rain, it gives reason to rejoice.  Indeed, I am living the best days of my life.  

On My Knees -- a prayer song for our pastor

We were blessed yesterday to celebrate our Pastor's 50th birthday.  I was honored to contribute a small part to the celebration by writing a song for the worship service.  And while I wrote the song with our pastor in mind, I believe it speaks to all of us and the wonderful privilege we have of accessing the Father through prayer.  Prayer is an amazing gift we have been given by a loving God who desires a full and intimate relationship with us.


On My Knees
words and music by Terha Knittel
copyright 2011
Etched within the emptiness I sometimes feel
When strength to handle one more thing does not exist
In corners dark, elusive answers are playing hide and seek
Despair has mocked my faith and fear has raised it's fist -- at me


My hope is found when to the ground
My knees come to a rest
Bowed beneath a weight I simply cannot bear
I am here in this holy place of prayer


CHORUS

Down on my knees I will find all I need

Down on my knees I'll find You're all I need

As I look to You

And I trust in You

Here with you, on my knees

The heart holds all His faithfulness that time reveals
I'm not alone, or on my own, He lives in me
In tender moments held within His warm embrace
My spirit soars and once again my heart is free


My hope is found when to the ground
My knees come to a rest
And every question, every burden, every care
Is heard inside this holy place of prayer


CHORUS
Down on my knees I will find all I need

Down on my knees I'll find You're all I need

As I look to You

And I trust in You

Here with you, on my knees


(bridge -- )
I called Your name, You came

Your heard me, healed me
Your love has overwhelmed me
Your grace sufficient held me
Strength when I am weary
Power when I'm weak
The comfort I rely on
You're the wisdom that I seek

CHORUS

Down on my knees I will find all I need

Down on my knees I'll find You're all I need

As I look to You

And I trust in You

Here with you, on my knees

Everyday Reality: Ostrich Need Not Apply

On second thought...if reality was covered with marshmallows 

it would cushion the impact when it hits you 'up aside the head' 

AND the marshmallows could then be used as a tasty topping 

to a nice cup of hot chocolate (diversion therapy :)

( Terha Knittel, Facebook, 9/14/11)

When reality comes at you like a jumbo jet and uses your face as a landing field ... it's kind of hard to miss it.  I wonder if this is why we are sometimes prone to living like the proverbial ostrich with our head stuck in the sand.  There are certainly times when this way of dealing with life seems easier. No confrontations. No accountability. No responsibility for holding anyone accountable.  No messy stuff.  Preferring to see things the way we'd like them to be rather than the way they are. Living oblivious to life sounds tempting at times, but it's not real.  It's not truthful.  It's not safe.

Reality must be met head on.  Life must be lived with our eyes open and our ears in tune to what is going on around us.  And we must love.  We must forgive.  Seeing the unbelievable and the undesirable. Hearing the hurtful and regretful. Recognizing our own faults and being willing to accept that we are all faulty. 

The dictionary says disenchantment and disillusion result when we see the harshness of everyday reality. But when we fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, he is our great delight.  The reality we face might affect us, but it doesn't need to destroy us.  And we must forgive. We must love.

There is a genuine-ness to love that is expected of us. Romans 12:9 says, "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good."  Somehow we find a balance between opening our eyes to truth and choosing to love.  Often truth is ugly.  It reveals information we would rather not know or have known about us.  But we gain very little by ignoring truth in order to escape unpleasantness. To be sure, we are not given the freedom to pronounce judgment and dole out vengeance in the name of truth.   Walking in the Spirit allows our love to be genuine. Galatians 5 tells us the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  The Spirit led life permits us to live and worship in truth amid the harsh realities of life.

Jesus doesn't love us because he turns his head and lives oblivious to our sin.  He loves. Period. He is able to know the deep inner secrets of our lives and, in spite of how unpleasant that may be, he loves us anyway.

We should not be afraid of facing the realities of life or avoid truth in order to remain unshaken.  Life is hard.  We are sinful people.  But we can walk in truth and love if we allow the Holy Spirit to do his work in our lives.  Walking in the Spirit becomes a much more fulfilling and safe place to live rather than with our heads in the sand.

Public Displays of Affection

One of the truly amazing truths about our God is that He came near!  He came to us and desires to be in relationship with us.  He has instigated the relationship. The God of the Universe who holds the world in his hands wants to hold my hand.  That's a personal aspect of relationship often referred to as p.d.a. (public display of affection).  It is a marvelous, humbling privilege to be desired by the God of All Creation and be aware of his beautiful affection for me.

In a song written by John Mark McMillan, How He Loves, there is a phrase he uses that is not usually heard in the radio versions of the song.  

So Heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss

Talk about public display of affection!  He came near -  bursting on the scene with a huge outpouring of love.  This wasn't a reserved, conservative, socially acceptable display!  He held nothing back and didn't care who was looking.  He came near - unable to contain Love.  

And our response .... is it reserved?  Are we being too conservative?  Do we run our displays of affection for Him through the filter of what is deemed socially acceptable?  I wonder, are we holding back, concerned about whether anyone is looking? 

When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory, And I realise just how beautiful You are, And how great Your affections are for me. 

Oh, how He loves us! Maybe this should be declared The Year of Public Displays of Affection for the Awesome God of Love who is all about holding hands and sloppy wet kisses....huge, demonstrative displays of affection.